Finally! One of the meezers has drawn first blood. Can you believe it took him almost FIVE years to complete the Tomcat Maturity ritual??? Woman once again failed to read Fluffy's Guide to Unwanted Human Interference and attempted to clip Jack's claws. Scratch! I yelled to him while he was in her arms. And scratch he did! He might turn out to be a useful minion after all.

Finally! My plan went on hiatus while I mourned the loss of my minion, Goldie. But I've received word that she's at the Rainbow Bridge recruiting new minions so I can rule in this world and beyond.

Man and Woman were very upset, too. I tried to explain that she was continuing to work on my Evil Plan, but it doesn't seem to have helped.

I recently tried to go outside to further the Plan, but that damned Cloak of Invisibility doesn't work. Woman kept spotting me as I got close to the door.

I looked into the matter of the Cloak. I'm told it does work, but it's the Cloak that's invisible, not the wearer. What moron came up with that idea? Guess I'll stick to the Cape of Evil from now on.