I've got a new plan ... well, not really, my plan still is to achieve World Domination, but I think I have located a new ally in my quest. It's called a Dyson.

I've learned that bad, evil things are said by humans to suck. This Dyson also sucks. Therefore, using Fluffy's Third Corrollary to Blackie's Law of Ridiculous Relational Properties, the Dyson must be evil. If you've never studied Feline-ential Equations, the logic is probably over your human head.

Woman thinks she can control this machine, but I have seen it eat curtains of its own volition. This upsets her and makes a terrible noise. Unlike my fellow feline house dwellers and the dumb dogs, I am not afraid of Dyson. Nay, I feel a strange camaraderie with it as it also suffers from the MAIN FLAW. I like the feel of my coat being thinned of loose fur by this device and follow Woman around while she attempts to exhibit her mastery over it. She gets annoyed because I always seem to trip her while she is doing battle, but ... sigh ... evil dictates that I must take its side over hers.